Visiting the grave is a symbolical act in Islam. You can see a trend starting to arise where people are visiting the graves of loved ones to pay their respects, and read up on their lives in the below link.
Many Muslim women have visited the graves of loved ones, as they are considered holy places. A place of remembrance is considered a sacred space that deserves reverence.
In Islam, the deceased do not possess free will while in heaven, so it is still important to write down any memories of the deceased so they can be remembered by those who brought them to heaven.
A few sites have been created for Muslims to visit the graves of relatives and friends. These sites are called mausoleums, and they are designated for people who do not have a family member or close friend who lives nearby.
Contents:
In Islam
A woman cannot visit the graves of her dead relatives, even if she was a significant character in the relatives’ lives. This is stipulated in Islam as it is the right of the dead to have a female relative visit their graves.
This prohibition does not apply to nonrelatives, such as friends or neighbors, who might be interested in visiting the graves.
Despite this prohibition, both women and men can send flowers and/or fruit. The reason for this is that both God and Muhammad honored the deceased with beautiful flowers and/or fruit trees.
Permission to visit the grave
Permission to visit the grave is rarely granted in Islam. While some scholars allow it, others strongly discourage it.
If a woman were to visit the grave of her dead husband, daughter, or friend, she would probably discover several things. First, she would pray that her departed loved one is at peace and that her faith helped her to make an appointment with the angels. She would then leave this decision up to God.
Some experts believe that brief visits help keep the deceased company and gain some closure. When a death does not happen in a timely manner, there is still hope for God to grant someone eternal peace.
However, visitors are not without danger. If one were to fall victim to a murder–or perhaps they just wanted attention so bad?–then divine intervention did not seem like such a far reach.
Who gives permission to visit the grave?
In Islam, there is a rule that prohibits a person from going to the grave of someone who died without permission from the deceased person’s family. This rule was established to avoid any type of glorification or honor for the deceased.
But who gives permission to visit the grave?
Many people in society, including Muslim societies, have crossed this boundary and given up-or even claimed-permission to God. Thus, God may be considered kuffar (unbelievers), as he does not give him any permission to come unto his own grave.
What should be done before visiting the grave?
Before visiting the grave, should the woman perform Umrah or not? Should she pray at the grave? Should she visit other graves?
Paragraph Umrah is one of the Five Pillars of Islam. In fact, it is considered mandatory for all Muslims. So, if a woman wants to visit the grave of her husband, she must perform Umrah at his funeral.
But does performing Umram at a man’s grave make her equal to him as a Muslim? Does it mean she is allowed to go to his grave and pray on his behalf?
As you know, Islam considers death a major transition into God. So, if a woman prays at a man’s grave, she is considered equal to him in terms of prayer. This is called siyam al-taharah (confronting oneself with prayer).
If she also performs umra at that same man’s grave, then she becomes siyam al-taharah (confronting herself with prayer) toward God.
What should you wear to visit the grave?
As a woman, you should know that there are some rites of passage that are female only. These include burial and visitation rights, so keep an open mind and your input is needed.
Many Muslim women face pressure to conform to traditional gender expectations. Visiting the grave of a deceased husband or loved one can be viewed as a sign of respect.
If you are invited to visit the grave of an Islamic man, an Islamic widow or any other person with no close family, it may be difficult. The visiting family must consist of close friends or someone who is trained in religion and funeral ceremonies.
The most important aspect of visiting the grave is listening attentively and physically attending to what was said. If something significant was remembered about the person, then this must be conveyed well enough for it to be accepted.
If you have questions about visiting the grave in Islam, ask before you go.
What do you do at the grave?
At the grave, a woman must pay homage to the deceased by cleaning and comforting her remains. This includes removing any jewelry or tags, washing and drying the corpse, and arranging a prayer at the grave site.
This is a very special visit for a woman, as she must attend with her husband or other members of her family. She may also visit other graves nearby if there are multiple deaths nearby.
If she decides to go alone, she must wear a veil to cover her face and body as well as stay in place while she attends the grave. She may not bring anyone else with her during this visit so be careful not to make any mistakes.
The length of time that it takes to complete this visit can be awhile depending on how quickly you get people to respond.
How close can I sit or stand next to the grave?
Islam does not allow women to visit the graves of their dead spouses or relatives. This is a strict Islamic rule, and one that has created difficulties for members of the Muslim community who have lost a loved one.
Many families have difficulty arranging a family visit, or arrange an extended visit with another family member when the woman is deceased. Visiting the cemetery can be difficult and expensive, making it an outmoded tradition.
Even in cases where there is no other family member present to perform a visitation, such as at the gravesite or in memory services, it can be hard to avoid being too close. The smell of fresh soil and death is overpowering and makes it difficult to distance oneself from it.
Visiting the cemetery can be uncomfortable and awkward, making people hesitate to do so. It also becomes costly as you have to pay for your own entrance into the cemetery and then visiting the grave.
What should I bring to give to the dead person?
As mentioned earlier, there are some things that should be given to the person in Islam. These include food, flowers, and/or a lullaby.
Many people find comfort in these items during their time of need. If you are unable to do this, then don’t worry- there are several places where you can give someone comfort during their time of need.
Grief support groups are a good starting point. They can be very helpful as they don’t necessarily focus on you as a person, but as someone who is grieving they may be able to help.
As mentioned earlier, flowers and/or a lullaby can be given to express feeling of sadness or grief.