When your husband has gone off to work, work hours, or leave without telling you, it can be difficult. There are several things you can do to get him back home for supper or to see you off into the morning.
We will start with the easier of the two options. You can write him a sweet note telling him how much you love him and that you miss him and want him home soon. If he reads your note on campus, he may return his answer quickly.
If he writes back, may as well send a quick yes or no to that letter. Most of the time, he will stay up-to-date with a brief reply before he makes his mind up on whether to come home or not.
The third option is going over his shoulder and getting my husband to do the same. We have been married for almost five years now, and have been working together for about four of those years. When we were first married, we worked from home due to our schedule at that time.
Stop fighting for once
When one member of the family gets married, the rest of the family can benefit from a little forgiveness.
It’s called matrimonial amnesty and it occurs when families reconcile after being at odds for a while. In fact, it can happen several times during this period.
As hard as it can be to give up your expectations and demands, it’s important to do so for your better health and safety. If you two have made some mistakes, like spending money or doing something illegal before marriage, then forgive each other together.
Too often in our society, people judge and criticize each other before they even talk about what happened. This causes deep healing scars that never fade, makes no sense that they’d fight back- Especially when they are still fighting about something so long after it happened.
Listen to what he has to say
If your husband has gone away for a short time, you can ask him to listen to what he has to say while he’s at home. He can call home and ask if he can come back home.
If he’s gone away for a longer period of time, you can call him and request that he come back home. Most times, he will agree since it might be important for him to return.
Some things that your husband might have to say when he returns home are things like “oh my god, I forgot how amazing it was before I left, thank God I went ahead and booked my honeymoon now!” or “I never thought I’d be excited to come home again, but I am! Thank you for making me stay in such great shape while I was away!”
Those kinds of statements are proof that he has been working out, having fun, and keeping his mind sharp while he is away. He must have enjoyed it too since he’s talking about coming home with big smiles.
Make plans for the future
If your husband has made a few mistakes in the past, you can talk to him about how he can make a better next step.
It’s important to know what he did wrong and how he can make it up to you. This helps create trust in him and continue to build your marriage.
If your husband has done something wrong that was serious, you can ask the Lord to forgive him. Then, when there is a little misstep, you can say: “I’m sorry, husband. We’re done for now. I won’t look for another man or try to change my husband. This is our marriage and its mistakes, not the other guy’s.”
Remember, forgiveness is an important part of getting your husband back into your life. He may need to apologize again or do some different things to make it up to you.
Apologize for your mistakes
If your husband has made some mistakes in the past, you can try to get him to apologize for them.
Sometimes, when a guy gets into a bad habit, he doesn’t want to think about it or realize it happened. If he sticks his head out of that habit, then he’s already apologized for it.
If he’s made some poor decisions in the past, try to use this as an opportunity to apologize for those decisions. If you were involved in any type of relationship, you probably shared some common experiences so it may be easier for you to accept his apology on that basis.
Maybe one of the things that hurt your relationship the most was something that he did. You wanted him to know how much you loved him but you couldn’t tell him because of all the things that hurt your relationship.
No double standards
Your husband should be able to look at your past behavior and decide that you were cheating, leaving him with the burden of proving that you’re not a cheater.
This is important! Your husband should be able to judge you on your actions, not your words. He should be able to understand that while you were cheating, you were also staying at another person’s house without his knowledge.
If your husband has recently admitted to affairs, there is a good chance he is still processing it. This can make him feel like he isn’t good enough or liked enough to stay with him, and this can leave him feeling like he needs to protect himself by going through a period of no contact.
No contact is the best way for him to get this done, though! You can let him know how much it means to you by no longer talking to each other about this and letting it heal from there.
Embrace her femininity
Men are expected to be tough and masculine, which can make it difficult for them to accept or even understand how to respond to a feminine person like their wife.
If your husband has a hard time coming back home, there are a few things you can do to make him more comfortable in your home and enjoy spending time with you. For example, buy him a gift he likes or maybe one that is cute on both sides.
If you have children, the easiest way for him to get back into the lifestyle is if he married before marijuana was legal and recreational use was allowed. By then, he had some experience with pot so he could come back to basics!
Having sex often is a sign that your husband is not spending enough time in his marriage. If he is not getting intimate with you, then it is time for him to start.
Be confident in yourself
A confidence-based husband is the most powerful ally you can get against baffledness in getting your wife to come back home. If you can’t help but feel confident in your ability to make her feel comfortable and confident in you, this will help a lot in coaxing your husband to come home.
If your husband doesn’t think he can make her feel comfortable or that he won’t be good at it, then he’ll be reluctant to leave the bedroom and go out. He’ll also probably be distracted when he does leave the bedroom, so beware of any signs of fatigue or sleepiness that appear.
To make him feel more comfortable leaving the house, do things that make you feel relaxed and comfortable. If you have to go somewhere warm, do it. Just like at home, if your husband thinks it is too cold outside, find someplace that feels warm and comfortable.
Be aware of what kind of environment your husband sees as well. A beautiful place might drive him crazy! Be confident in yourself and in how you want to approach life.
Do not blame her for the divorce
If your husband has a problem with the idea of a divorce, then trying to convince him that it is his fault and that he should go back to her is only going to make him feel like he is not taking enough steps to make it on his own.
If you try to tell your husband that he should go back to you, he will most likely reply with something like: “Well, I don’t see how it’s helping me out much, and I think it would be better if we just parted ways.”
He may even say that he doesn’t want this marriage to be about him, but about them together as a couple, not as individuals fighting in the middle of an argument.
If you really want your husband to change, then you must work on yourself. You must realize what changes you into and out of yourself.